Hey Lady, What's That On Your Head?

Being at the corporate hierarchy at a level in which I am twice as old as some of these people who are making 4 times more than I am, I have to remind myself of something very important. While they are well-schooled, they lack the life's experience that I have, which clearly deprives them of having some of the common decencies the rest of us have had years to learn.

Every morning as I make that morning drive, I try real hard to anticipate what's coming so I can be better prepared for my day. There is never enough foresight lately. Through those life's experiences I mentioned above, there are three that will strengthen your character - getting audited, getting divorced and being an assistant. And there are 2 that aren't worth the consequences - extra mayonnaise and telling off your boss.

But let's jump back a few years when I was pregnant with my second child, my Ivy League graduated boss was relocating out of the country. He was so self-involved that my days were consumed with packing his office as I waddled around, took frequent breaks to prop up my stove-pipe legs. I was not sure I'd ever see my ankles again. After finishing up a call to customs to figure out how to get his dogs safely abroad, he asked me to also make sure his locker in our office gym was cleaned of its contents. Oh yea, baby...as I opened the locker door, I removed dirty socks, toothpaste, and last, but not least, a filthy, smelly, dirty JOCK STRAP! If it hadn't been dirty, I swear I would have put it on my head like a cute derby hat and traipsed back upstairs. Because I promise you, nobody would have believed I had been asked to do such a crappy thing. You probably think I made this up to sound cute and interesting. Although, now that I think on it, cleaning that locker out is probably a skill more useful than a Swiss Army Knife. That guy was oblivious! My pink slip didn't work for him at the time; however, I guess I have the last laugh, since he got the ultimate pink slip. Fraud or something...maybe more jock strap episodes...

SERIOUSLY? Every day is a marvel of stupidity. Just stop and look around. You're already on the bus.